Nouri No Kaisen -- Games of the Mind
by Shinimegami1
Summary: Tasuki has a dream that plagues him. He then meets a girl, Lena. He instantly falls in love with her, but doesn't belive it, because he decidedly hates them. What are these dreams? Will Tasuki go to the extreme for Lena? Rated R for adult content, languag
1. Nouri No Kaisen -- Games Of The Mind

Authors Note: Hello all! Finally sat down to write my Tasuki fanfic! I've set the story after the whole series. Well... here's the first chappy! Please don't forget to review!!!

Disclaimer: Fushigi Yuugi, Tasuki, or any of the characters (except Lena), used in this story, are mine. They belong to Yuu Watase. Just going to use them for a bit... ^_~

Warning!!! If you disagree with violence, language, and sexual content (its not to bad.. but there is some), then please exit right now. This contains all of the above mentioned. If you're okay with it, then please, go right ahead. ^_~

Chapter One -- Nouri No Kaisen

Tasuki looked around at his fellow Seishi. Tamahome was sitting next to Miaka, cuddling her, and kissing her from time to time. Chiriko was studying, and Nuriko was trying to make a move on Hotohori ((Yes... he became gay again...)). Mitsukake and Chichiri were conversing about something, but Tasuki couldn't hear. Tasuki was left out again. He sighed, and looked up. He saw a black cloud coming towards them. "It'll be a few more hours." He thought to himself. But as he thought that, the cloud rolled closer and closer to them. But the others didn't seem to notice. The cloud rumbled over them, but they still didn't notice. 

"Hey! Guys! There's a huge cloud over us, dammit!" Tasuki yelled. They ignored him. They continued with what they were doing. He looked up at the cloud, as rain started falling from it. He looked back to where is friends were sitting. They had disappeared. "Is this some kind of sick joke?" He asked, to no one. A loud crack of lighting flashed, and struck his body.

Tasuki sat up in his bed. Beads of sweat dripped down his forehead and neck. These dreams had been plaguing him for along time. He was breathing heavily. 

"Did I wake you, no da?" Chichiri turned around from the window. 

Tasuki shook his head. "No... it was a dream." He sighed.

"You don't look so good, no da. Wanna tell me your dream, no da?" Chichiri sat down beside him. 

"Eh... sure, why not." Tasuki said, wiping his forehead. "Well, we're all sitting outside for a picnic, or something, and everybody is doing something, except me. Tamahome and Miaka are cuddling, and shit." He started. "Chiriko is studying, and you and Mitsukake are talking." He said, as Chichiri nodded, with his cheery expression, as usual. "But we all know Mitsukake is dead, so it's a little strange to see him again. Anyway, Nuriko is working his 'charms' on Hotohori. And they're both dead. So is Chiriko. So it's a little strange."

"Maybe you just are mourning over them, no da." Chichiri offered.

"No. There's more." Tasuki said. "I'm feeling left out, because everybody except me has something to do, or someone to talk to. Then, I see a huge black storm cloud in the far off distance. I think nothing of it, because it would take some time to finally reach us. But then rain begins pouring. I try to tell you guys that it's raining, but you won't listen, dammit." Tasuki said, getting frustrated by his dream. Tasuki paused.

"Uh huh. Go on." Chichiri said.

"Well, I look up to see where the cloud is, and then, when I look back to you guys, you all disappeared." Tasuki clenched his sheets tightly in his hands. "I yell out to see where you all are, but there's no goddamn answer. Then... I get struck by lightning." Tasuki was clenching his sheets so tightly, he was cutting through the sheet into his skin. "That's when I wake up." He loosened his grip, but not enough to stop cutting his skin.

There was a long pause. "I see. I would say you're afraid of loosing something, no da." Chichiri said, after much thought.

"Ch'." Tasuki muttered under his breath. "What am I afraid of loosing? I'm not afraid of anything, dammit!" He shouted. He looked down and saw blood seeping through the sheets. He loosened his grip enough to let the sheet go.

"I don't know, no da." Chichiri looked up at him.

"Where do you get this idea from anyway?" Tasuki asked him, his fanged teeth showing.

"Well, the fact that we all disappear, and you yell out for us, no da. You worried about us. And then the fact that you get struck by lightning, no da. You wouldn't want to live if all of us disappeared, no da. Am I correct?" Chichiri explained his view of the dream.

"Hai." Tasuki muttered. "But, now that Konan is at peace with Kutou, I have no reason to worry about loosing any of you." 

"Yes, but you never know what may happen, no da. Life is full of mysteries, no da." Chichiri said.

"Yea, I guess." Tasuki said. "Eh... anyway, thanks for the advice. I think I'm going to get dressed now. I'm starved. Ask Miaka to make me some sake rice." Tasuki threw the sheets off of himself. 

"I will!" Chichiri said, getting up and heading towards the door. He walked out and made, what looked like a hand puppet with his hand and shut the door just by doing that.

Tasuki chuckled and got up. He washed his hands and got dressed. 

When he arrived at the table, Miaka and Tamahome were there. Chichiri was there, and a big bowl of sake rice was there. Tasuki smiled. 

"You remembered!" He sat down beside Chichiri. "I was afraid you'd forget."

"Me! Forget! How can you accuse me of such a thing?!" Chichiri exclaimed.

"How can I accuse you?" Tasuki repeated, picking up the bowl of rice. "Like I just did!" He scooped a spoonful into his bowl. He picked up his chopsticks and started eating the alcohol filled rice.

Tasuki's face was soon blushed from the sake rice, and was drunk. He had touched Miaka's breasts several times, due to his drunken state. Miaka was quickly slap him, and Tamahome would punch him. Chichiri would just shake his head back and forth. 

***

Tasuki was soon out of his drunken state by evening. 

"Hey, Chichiri could you pass me the sake?" Tasuki asked, pointing to the bottle. They were back at the table. 

"No! Not after the fiasco today, no da!" Chichiri exclaimed. 

"Aww... I'll be a good boy." Tasuki pleaded. 

"No." Chichiri took the bottle and put it back in the kitchen. 

"Fine. Be that way." Tasuki slouched, and pouted. 

There was a knock at the door.

"Eh... I'll get it." Tasuki said getting up. "Since I can't drink the beverage of my choice." He glared at Chichiri.

When Tasuki opened the door his mouth dropped. Standing there was a girl, with black hair, emerald green eyes, and tattered clothes. She looked frightened. 

"Can I please stay here tonight?" She asked Tasuki.

Tasuki couldn't reply. Her beauty was shocking to him. He tried to move his mouth, but it wouldn't move. 

"Sure. You can stay, no da!" Chichiri said, filling in the words for Tasuki.

"Arigatoh. Domo arigatoh gozaimus." She said, stepping in. "I'm Lena." She said.

Tasuki stood there, still holding the door wide open, and looking at the place where Lena had been previously standing.

"I'm Chichiri, no da." Chichiri introduced him self. He nudged Tasuki.

Tasuki snapped out of his daze and introduced him self. "I'm Tasuki." He smiles, his fanged teeth showing. Lena smiled back at him. She took off her tattered jacket she was wearing. She was tall, and slender. She was wearing a dress, which her hands swept passed by inches. Tasuki's jaw feel again. He quickly gathered himself this time. "Uhm.... Let me show you to your room." He smiled, taking her jacket. She smiled back.

Tasuki led her too a room, which was right beside his. "Here you go, Lena." He said smiling, holding the door open. She stepped in and looked around. A canopy bed was in a corner. Beside it was a nightstand. On the nightstand was a candelabra. A few feet away was a vanity set. It had a full-length mirror, and a set of combs and brushes. Lena smiled and turned to Tasuki.

"Thank you, Tasuki. For leading to my room, that is." She said.

Tasuki blushed. "you're welcome." he said sheepishly. "Here's your coat." He held out his arm with the coat draped on it.

"Thanks." Lena brushed her hand over his arm and took the coat. 

Tasuki felt a burning feeling creeping across his face. He shook his head, trying to make it go away. "Well, There are clothes in the wardrobe. Come down to the dining room for some dinner." He said quickly excusing himself.

"Alright. I'll be down in a few minutes." she said.

Tasuki nodded and closed the door. He leaned against it. "Godammit, Tasuki." he muttered to himself, holding his chest. "What is this feeling? Oh Come on Tasuki. You don't like girls, remember?" He thought to him self. "Get over her. You don't like girls." He repeated in his head.

***

Back at the dining room, Tasuki had settled him self in his usual seat and picked up a bowl of rice. 

"So, who's the girl?" Tamahome asked.

"Her name's Lena. She needs a place to stay." Tasuki replied shortly. 

Just then, Lena walked in wearing a traditional kimono. Her dark hair was brushed out and laid gently against her back. She looked around, unsure of where to sit. The only tow available seats were by Tasuki and Tamahome. She headed for the seat net to Tamahome.

"Uhm, I'm sorry, but this seat is Miaka's." He said, kindly, smiling.

"Oh, Gomen nasai." She said, taking the seat next to Tasuki. 

Tasuki blushed heavily and smiled, embarrassedly. 

When dinner was through, Tamahome and Miaka were the first to leave. They walked off towards Miaka's room, giggling. "Yeish... those two are at it again..." Tasuki muttered under his breath. 

Chichiri yawned. "Well, I'm off to bed, no da!" he got up and walked out, off to his own bedroom.

Tasuki sat there nervously, not sure whether to get up and go to bed, or wait for Lena to go. 

"Uhm... so..." Tasuki searched his mind for something to say. "Where are you from?" He finally sputtered out.

"I'm from Hokkan." She said, looking down at her lap. 

"Really? I've been there. It's nice. I'm amazed I didn't see your pretty face before. I would have remembered if I had." Tasuki said, not noticing what he was saying.

Lena blushed. "I don't get out much." She said, with an unsure sound in her voice. She was still looking down. 

"Oh. I see." Tasuki said, looking for some kind of comforting thing to say. 

"Well, I think I'm going to head off to bed." She said, finally.

"Yea. Me too." He said, standing up. Lena stood up with him. They walked together back to Lena's room.

"Well... here I am. At my room." Lena said.

"Yep. You're at your room." Tasuki said, nervously.

"Well... goodnight." She said, heading into her room.

"Good night." Tasuki said, closing the door for her.

Tasuki walked a few meters over and found him self at his own door. He didn't open it, though. He continued walking, to the end of the porch. He sat down on the bench and looked out at the glittering pond. The moon shone in the lake. Stars glittered in the reflection. Tasuki thought about Lena. How beautiful she was, and how he knew he couldn't have her. He knew she was too beautiful for him. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts, her didn't notice Lena sit down beside him. 

"Tasuki? Are you okay?" She asked him, placing her hand on his shoulder.

Tasuki jumped, startled but the tender touch. He realized it was Lena and sighed. "Yes... I was just thinking." he said.

"Oh. What about?" Lena asked curiously.

"Uhm..." Tasuki paused. "I was think about how beautiful..." he looked at the pond. He couldn't tell her how he felt about her. Not yet. "How beautiful the pond was. That's all." He said.

"Oh. I see. It is beautiful." Lena said, almost as if she was disappointed. She smiled, trying to hide her disappointment.

"You seem disappointed. Is everything okay?" Tasuki asked.

"Yes... I'm sorry... I was just thinking.. about.. something." She said, slowly. "It's alright." Tasuki said.

There was a long silence. "This silence is too loud. I gotta say something, but what? DAMMIT!" Tasuki thought to him self. His heart was pounding. He thought about going to bed, but then thoughts of Lena in bed with him popped into his head. He shook his head, thinking, "NO! I don't have feelings for a girl!"

"What's on your mind?" Lena asked.

"You." Tasuki said, not thinking. Lena was taken by surprise and blushed. Tasuki realized what he said, and blushed. "Uhm..." His heart pounded even harder. He blushed. "I... I mean..." He stuttered.

"Sshh... It's alright." Lena place her index finger on his lips. "Don't speak." Se pulled her hand away, placing it on the side of his face. She gently placed her lips on his and kissed him.

Tasuki's eyes widened by the shock. After getting over the shock, he placed his hand on her hip and kissed her back. She broke the kiss, and smiled. Tasuki smiled back. "Wow...." he murmured. 

" 'Wow' what?" she asked, still smiling. 

"I've.. never kissed a girl." He blushed, embarrassedly.

"It's alright. Don't be embarrassed." She said, her hand still on the side of his face. 

"I should really get to bed now..." He said, his heart still pounding. He was still slightly shocked by the kiss.

Lena looked down. "Yes, I guess I should too." She turned around.

He grabbed her arm gently. "Thank you." He said, smiling.

She smiled. "You welcome." She whispered, blowing him a light, feathery kiss.

Tasuki stood there, amazed by what had just happened. "I can't like girls..." He muttered. He stood up and walked back to his room. He lied down on his bed, not even bothering to change. All he could think about was Lena, and the kiss. After what seemed to be centuries of thinking, he finally drifted to sleep.

Well... what do you think? ^-^ Tasuki actually falling in love. Well... please review... and... tell me what you think. I don't know why, but I'm shaking as I write this... ^-^; Anyway... tell me what you think!!!

~~Sari


	2. Nouri No Kaisen -- Games Of The Mind

Authors Note: Ah finally! A second chapter! ^-^ Long chapters too... anyway... here it is! Please... ENJOY!!!

Disclaimers: I own nothing... ('Cept Lena!!!)

***

Chapter Two -- Nouri No Kaisen (Games of the Mind)

Tasuki awoke in the middle of the night, panting. He had the same dream again. Only this time, Lena was there. She, for some reason, was talking to Tamahome. Which had really hurt Tasuki, especially after that kiss they shared. And when he got hit by the lightning, he didn't wake up. Instead, he fell to the ground, in pain. He screamed out a certain four-letter curse word as he fell to the ground. The ground gave way and he fell... and when he landed, he was in his bed. He sat up, sweat pouring down his head. He lied back down, trying to get back to sleep, but he couldn't. He rolled around, pulled the sheets up over his head, and even tried counting sheep. Lena had, obviously, heard all the noise he was making and knocked on his door. 

"Tasuki? Are you ok?" she said through the door.

"Hai. I'm fine. You can come in if you would like." Tasuki replied.

Lena opened the door and stepped in. Tasuki quickly lit a candle. The candle illuminated her beautiful face. Even thought her eyes were red, and a bit baggy, her face was still beautiful. He smiled. 

"I could hear you rustling around. Is everything okay?" Lena asked. 

"Yes.. just a dream keeping me up." He sighed. 

"Want to tell me about it?" Lena offered.

"Sure." Tasuki said. Lena sat down beside him, on the bed. Tasuki explained his dream, just as he did with Chichiri.

"I've been having these dreams for a while now. Only tonight, you were in my dream. And, again, instead of talking to me, you talked to Tamahome. And this time, the dream was longer. Instead of waking up when I got hit by lightning, I fell. And when I landed, I was in my bed, panting, and sweating. Chichiri thinks I'm afraid of loosing all of my friends, and I guess I am." Tasuki explained to Lena. Lena listened intently, and nodded at all the right times. "She's so perfect." Tasuki thought to himself. "In every way." He added to his thoughts.

"Wow... pretty intense." Lena sighed. 

"What's got you up this late. I thought women needed they're beauty sleep. Then again, you don't need any of that, you're already pretty as it is." Tasuki said, not really thinking about what he was saying. 

Lena blushed, several shades of reds and pinks. "Well, thanks. But ..." She paused. "I guess you could say that my past is haunting me in a way." She said. 

"Oh." Tasuki sighed. "Do you want to tell me about it?" He offered

"Well... no, not really. Not now anyway." She sighed.

"Oh all right." Tasuki said, with a hint of disappointment in his voice. 

"I'm sorry. I just can't tell you right now." She said. "Anyway, I had best be going now..." She said standing up. 

Tasuki nodded, and stood up. "I'll walk you to your room."

Lena nodded and smiled up at him. They walked out of Tasuki's room, to Lena's room. Lena smiled. "Goodnight." She stood on her toes and kissed him.

Tasuki kissed her back and smiled. "Goodnight." He watched her every movement. He stood there, moments after she had shut her door. His heart was pounding again. He sighed. "Dammit, Tasuki! Don't blow it!" he thought to himself. "She'll tell you when she's ready." He whispered under his breath as he walked back to his room. He laid back down on his bed, not ready to go back to sleep. He thought to himself for hours. He was still up when the sun started to come up, but he was slowly drifting off to sleep. He finally fell asleep, just before Chichiri came in to open the windows and let the fresh summer air in. Chichiri looked at him in his sleep. "Poor guy, doesn't get much sleep with those dreams plaguing him." He said under his breath. He left, silently.

It wasn't until after lunch Tasuki finally woke up. He stretched his arms out and yawned. He sat up and rubbed his eyes. He got up out of bed and put his regular clothes on. His white shirt, tan pants, and his dark, midnight-blue, jacket, and his colorful beaded necklaces. He walked out onto the porch and breathed in the fresh afternoon air. He grinned, his fanged teeth poking out of the sides of his mouth. He walked into the dining room. Tamahome, Miaka, Chichiri, and Lena were already there. 

"Ah! What's for breakfast?" Tasuki clapped his hands together, taking his seat.

"Breakfast?" Miaka said. "It's past lunch. We're just having a light snack." She said, looking at him weirdly.

Tasuki's mouth dropped. "NANI? Why the hell didn't anyone wake me up?" He yelled.

"I told them you need your sleep." Lena said.

"Why? I like eating..." he said, more calmly. He avoided eye contact with her. 

"I'm sorry." She looked down at her lap.

"Its ok..." He said, looking down at his lap also.

"Hey, Miaka?" Tamahome whispered to Miaka. "What's up with them... they aren't looking anywhere except they're laps." 

"Yea.. I know..." Miaka whispered back.

Tasuki crumpled his napkin, then uncrumpled it, trying to think of something to say. 

"Tasuki. Daijoubo?" Chichiri asked.

"Hai... hai.... I just can't believe I slept this long." He lied. What was really on his mind was Lena. He was trying to think of something to say. Something clever, something smart, something... seductive. He quickly shook his head, wiping the thought away. He looked up across the table. Tamahome was staring at him, with a strange look on his face. 

"Yes?" Tasuki asked, somewhat annoyed. They never got along. Ever since the day they had met, which was a very... sad, angry night. A night Tasuki would rather forget.

"Nothing... you just look.. dazed." Tamahome replied, shaking his head.

"Yea... whatever." Tasuki muttered. He stood up. "I'll be in my room if anyone needs me." He walked out, towards his room. He didn't go into his room, he walked right past it. He went to the pond. He looked into it. He saw his reflection. His unruly orange hair, his amber eyes, and his fanged teeth. He still didn't find himself worthy enough for Lena. He sighed, and closed his eyes. When he opened them again, he looked back into the pond. He saw his reflection, and Lena's reflection as well. She was sitting beside him, looking at his reflection.

"You are so beautiful." Lena sighed, looking at his amber eyes.

"You're the beautiful one." He responded. He didn't take compliments to well, especially from a girl.

Lena sighed. "Look at that reflection." She pointed at Tasuki. "That flaming hair, and those graceful amber eyes." She sighed again.

"But those soft emerald green eyes. And the jet-black hair, which falls so carelessly on your shoulders." Tasuki ran his fingers through her hair. 

"Yes but look at that slender, but muscular body of yours." She ran her hand across his stomach.

Tasuki felt him self harden at the touch of her fingers. He inhaled deeply, thinking of some sort of response. Instead, he picked her up, cradling her in his arms. He carried her back to his room. He laid her on his bed. She smiled up at him. He leaned down and kissed her lips. He felt her kiss him back. He gently parted her lips. He felt her tongue up against his. He slowly untied the waistband to the kimono she was wearing, still kissing her. The kimono robe slipped open delicately. Lena was slowly pulling the coat he wore off his shoulders. She played with the buttons and pulled his shirt off. Tasuki moaned softly in his throat, still embraced in the kiss with Lena. He ran his hand across her chest. He could feel Lena's heart beat. It was as fast as his was beating. Lena started pulling at the waist of his pants. She pulled them down, past his knees. Lena could see how hard he was. She kissed him even deeper and ran her hand over it. Tasuki moaned again, this time louder. "Lena... I... Love... You." Tasuki panted between kisses. 

When Lena heard this she quickly stood up, blushed. She grabbed her kimono and put it on carelessly. She tied the waistband over it. She quickly hurried out. She closed the door and paused a minute. "I love you too, my Tasuki. I just... can't tell you." She whispered under her breath as she ran into her room, tears streaming down her face. 

Tasuki looked at the closed door. He sighed. "I told you, dammit. You'd blow it." He thought to himself. "K'so..." He murmured lightly. 

***

The next day, Tasuki refused to leave his room. He was distraught by what had happened the night before. He had confessed his love, to the only person he loved in his life. And she didn't even feel the same in return. She had teased him. Lead him on. Made him believe. Believe in what he never believed in before. Love. She made him think it was real. And now, it was shattered. Shattered by the simple movement of getting up. An unusual wetness was on Tasuki's face. "Don't be a pussy. Boys don't cry." He told him self, drying his face.

The rest of the day he thought to him self. When Chichiri came by to check on him, he told him he had been up all night, and couldn't sleep. Which was true... but for another reason than what Chichiri thought. Tasuki lied there, for hours on end, letting the tears fall from his eyes. He didn't care anymore. He had lost what had meant the most to him. His Lena. His koi. He sighed. Then, the conversation between him and Chichiri crept back in his head. _"Maybe you're afraid of loosing something."_ His voice echoed in his head. "Of course!" Tasuki exclaimed. "That's what he means! That's what the dreams mean!" He said to him self. He was happy he figured out what his dreams had meant, but the happiness lasted only for a moment. He remembered that he had lost Lena. He sighed. 

"I have to face her." He said standing up. He walked out of his room into the dark night, and knocked on Lena's door.

"Yes?" And answer came back.

"May I come in?" Tasuki tried disguising his voice.

"Who is it?" Lena replied

"Of course." Tasuki thought. "Uhm... It's me Tasuki." He replied in his normal voice.

"Oh. Tasuki. Yes, you may come in." Lena replied shortly.

Tasuki opened the door and stepped in. He looked down. He had turned several shades of red. Lena had her back to him. She was curled into a tight ball. 

"Lena, what happened last night? How come when I told you... that I loved you, you left?" Tasuki came right out and said it. 

"I... It's nothing." She said.

"It is something, otherwise you wouldn't have ran away like that." Tasuki insisted, stepping closer to the bed.

"Tasuki... you wouldn't understand." Lena's voice cracked.

"I wouldn't understand what?" He asked.

"My life. What I've been through." Lena cried.

"Tell me." Tasuki said, sitting next to her on the bed. 

"Back in Hokkan... there was a guy... Shin. He.. told me he loved me. And, I loved him back. Dearly. With all my heart. Only, one night... he... he.... he raped me!" She broke into tears. "That's why..." She sniffed, "I came here." She sobbed on Tasuki's shoulder. Tasuki wrapped his arms around her.

"Then he never truly loved you." Tasuki rocked her in his arms. Lena nodded, her head still buried in Tasuki's chest. 

"But, I do love you. I really do." Lena sobbed. She clenched her hands tightly.

"It'll be alright. Just, don't think." Tasuki whispered delicately in her ear. "Not to night." 

Lena nodded. She pulled away from Tasuki. "I'm going to try and sleep now." 

"Yes.. I should too." Tasuki stood up, and headed for the door. 

"No.. please, don't go. Stay here, with me." Lena said, reaching her arm out to Tasuki. Tasuki nodded and took her hand. He climbed into the bed with her and cuddled up to her. He ran his fingers through her hair. "I love you." He whispered in her ear. Lena didn't hear him though. She had drifted of into a peaceful sleep. Tasuki soon drifted into a peaceful sleep of his own. The first peaceful sleep he had had in months. 

***

Well... what did you think. Chapter Two. ^-^ Please review the story... Oh, and don't worry... there's more to come!!! ^-^ Just hold on!!!

~~Sari


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